Guns 'n' whiskey

The great state of Tennessee, which used to be known as the three states of Tennessee before a dentist from Mississippi became governor and thought the state should at least pretend to be more unified, is giving us a law that can only be described as, well, the dumbest law ever devised by a state legislature. Looking at it, I can only conclude that the state legislators of Tennessee are complete morons who hid behind the door the day the brains were given out.

But what can you actually expect from the state that probably leads the country in meth labs per capita? I was in Tennessee recently and had the misfortune of having to purchase some behind the counter allergy medicine, the kind that has a banned substance used in concocting methamphetine. In order to buy said medicine, one must show the behind the counter staff your ID and sign a form that says you will abide by some part of the U.S. code that presumably deals with what you intend to do with a banned substance.

"This is the part where I swear I won't use it to make meth, right?" I said to the nice lady behind the counter, who promptly looked at me like I'd just insulted her favorite nephew, which, given the propensity of meth labs in the state, I may well have.

This isn't the first time, of course, that Tennessee has given us something of a dubious nature. The state's given us three presidents, although none of them were actually born there. There was that son of a bitch Andy Jackson, a war "hero" who launched the native southeasterners on what became known as the Trail of Tears. He had a particularly strong hatred for the natives.

There was the uneducated tailor Andrew Johnson, picked by Abe Lincoln as his vice president in an unsuccessful bid to coddle the South. Johnson, I suppose, you could call the accidental president, coming to the office as he did via the assassination of his predecessor. Johnson's chief claim to fame is botching Reconstruction so badly that we still haven't recovered from it.

And then there's James K. Polk. I have no idea who he was or what he did, but given Tennessee's track record with presidents, it was likely nothing to write home about. It's probably a good thing that the Supreme Court stole the election from Al Gore.

It's not that I don't appreciate the state of Tennessee, mind you. There have been some good things to come from there. Gore, for example. He's done more as a private citizen to get things moving on the environmental disaster we're living in than he probably could have done as president having to fight the idiots who make up Congress, who, after all, are just a few steps above state legislators. Or, in the case of congresscritters like Michelle Bachman, a few steps below.

And there's Dolly Parton. She's funny, can actually sing and write songs, is fairly liberal and has done more for the incredibly poor people of her native Sevier County on her own than the state ever even thought of doing. She may look fake, but she is as real as they come.

And then there's ... um ... I'm sure there's something else. It's a very beautiful state. But I've gone on long enough and not even told you what the Incredibly Stupid Law does.

It allows people to go into bars with guns.

I know. I mean, I watched Deadwood. I have no desire whatsoever to live it.

Now, to be fair, the law does allow individual bars to "opt out" by posting a sign saying they don't allow guns, which I think the legislators added in because somebody told them it might be unconstitutional to force private businesses to allow people to bring guns.

But seriously, for what unimaginable reason did these guys think it was a good idea to mix alcohol and guns? Were they worried about a terrorist attack on the local Last Chance Saloon and thought, hey, if the citizens are armed, they can put down that problem right there. Or maybe Tennessee has a problem with shootings in bars the way other states have at schools.

Y'gotta admit. It is an awfully stupid law. But on the other hand, maybe it's not such a bad idea after all. Who's going to be going into a bar with a gun? Stupid people, that's who. And if they get a little intoxicated and then get into some ridiculous altercation with somebody, whose loss is it really -- besides their families -- if they shoot each other to death? Now, given that drunks probably can't shoot straight, some innocent bystanders will probably get hurt. But they're probably packin too and it was just happenstance that they weren't the ones in the fight that time.

So why not make it a national law? Why should Tennessee have all the fun? Congress could style it The Stupid People Eradication Act of 2009, and we'd all be a lot happier and safer because of it.

Just imagine if murdering extremists Scott Roeder, James von Brunn and Abdulhakim Muhammad Bledsoe had run into one another at a bar with that law in effect. Roeder and von Brunn woulda probably shot Bledsoe just on principle right away, then Roeder and von Brunn would get into a fight over whether providing abortions is worse than being black or Jewish, and eventually they would pull out their guns, fire, and they'd both be dead. In a matter of moments, three fewer terrorists on the loose.

And three more Americans who did nothing wrong would still be alive.

I'm not sure what the Tennessee legislature hopes to accomplish with this law, but I think, if applied correctly, it could seriously reduce the problems caused by insufficient or corrupted brain activity.

And who wouldn't want that?


AWOP Political Contributing Editor

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Conspiracy to commit terrorism

America suffered a terrorist attack on Sunday. One man, the target of the terrorist assassination, was killed.

Oh, don't expect my colleagues to report it that way, because that ain't gonna happen. In fact they're gonna go along with cops.

At this time we feel this is an act of an isolated individual.

And that, my friends, is -- say it with me -- bullshit.

Wichita police also think they "the right person arrested" for the assassination of George Tiller, a Kansas doctor who provided abortions -- and, more crucial to this story -- late term abortions. Not late term "oh my god I really don't want to have a baby" abortions, mind you, but late term "this baby is going to be born with a serious defect and continuing the pregnancy putsthe mother's life at risk" abortions.

Since police think that Scott Roeder is the right person, let's just assume that he is. After all, they caught him in the car identified by witnesses at Tiller's church where he was killed.

Oh, I didn't mention that the motherfucker went to the man's church and killed him there, where he was serving as an usher? What does that say about the killer?

So police caught Scott Roeder in the car witnesses identified. The car with the license plate number witnesses provided investigators. So, I'm gonna go out on a limb here and dispense with Mr. Roeder's constitutional right to presumption of innocence and go all Nancy Grace on him.

He's guilty. Guilty. Guilty. Guilty. Guilty.

And so is Bill O'Reilly.

Yeah, that Bill O'Reilly. Are there any others?

George Tiller was a special target for O'Reilly, who regularly called him Tiller the Baby Killer, and last mentioned the doctor on his show, the most-watched news show on cable television, on April 27. Gabriel Winant at Salon:

[T]he Fox bully repeatedly portrayed the doctor as a murderer on the loose, allowed to do whatever he wanted by corrupt and decadent authorities. . . O'Reilly's language describing Tiller, and accusing the state and its elites of complicity in his actions, could become extremely vivid. . . "No question Dr. Tiller has blood on his hands. But now so does Governor Sebelius. She is not fit to serve. Nor is any Kansas politician who supports Tiller's business of destruction. I wouldn't want to be these people if there is a Judgment Day. I just -- you know ... Kansas is a great state, but this is a disgrace upon everyone who lives in Kansas. Is it not?

But let's not blame all of this on Bill O'Reilly. He'd love that anyway. Then he can sit on his high horse, toss his hands in the air and claim his innocence because he's just a guy with a microphone.

Exactly.

But let's look beyond that. Roeder is supposedly a member of Operation Rescue, the anti-abortion outfit founded by Randall Terry and now run by Troy Newman, who found he had a hard time getting past all the private security guards and the armored car and the gated community that his ilk forced on Tiller. So instead, he targeted Tiller's employees, doing things like sending anonymous postcards to their neighbors with photographs of mangled fetuses, telling them their neighbor -- by name -- "participates in killing babies like these."

Newman issued a statement, of course, condemning the shooting and saying he hoped that the act of a deranged individual didn't cast a pall on the "peaceful" actions of Operation Rescue.

Yes. Peaceful.

And what of Randal Terry? He condemned the shooting too.

George Tiller was a mass-murderer. We grieve for him that he did not have time to properly prepare his soul to face God. I am more concerned that the Obama Administration will use Tiller's killing to intimidate pro-lifers into surrendering our most effective rhetoric and actions. Abortion is still murder. And we still must call abortion by its proper name; murder.

Those men and women who slaughter the unborn are murderers according to the Law of God. We must continue to expose them in our communities and peacefully protest them at their offices and homes, and yes, even their churches.

Did I mention that Operation Rescue is based in Kansas and that George Tiller was their Public Enemy No. 1? Must be a lot of celebrating going on at the office today. Guess they'll have to pick another target now and move their HQ.

Oh, and let's add former Kansas Attorney General Phil Kline, the anti-abortion activist who used his state office to harass Tiller legally. Kline lost in court.

Scott Roeder. He served two months of a 16 month sentence in prison after being caught with explosives in his car. And a military rifle, a gas mask, mask canisters, rifle and pistol ammunition and a sheath knife. He posted his feelings on Operation Rescue's Web site and others. He has been associated with the anti-government Freemen movement. His ex-wife said part of the reason for their divorce 12 years ago was his "radical views."

Radical views. That's what they are. Out there. Crazy. But right in line with the Republican Party. Why, just the other day the Senate Minority Leader, Mitch McConnell, told CNN he was too busy to tell his fellow partiers to stop calling Supreme Court nominee Sonia Sotomayor a racist, even though he disagreed with the tactic, because he was just too busy.

Look. I've got a big job to do dealing with 40 Senate Republicans and trying to advance the nation's agenda, and better things to do than be the speech police over people who have their views about a very important appointment.

Guess he hasn't really had time to tell folks to stop inciting violence either. Like Sunday's violence. Like the violence in Tennessee a year ago where another "isolated incident" saw James David Atkisson kill two people at a Unitarian Universalist Church because he didn't like liberals. Or loner Eric Robert Rudolph, who targeted family planning clinics, gay bars and the Olympics for his fury (Rev. Spitz, can you find me over here?) Or Timothy McVeigh, for that matter.

And then they wonder why the Department of Homeland Security would dare to issue a report on extremist right wing violence. I suspect the right wingers were really upset about that report because they knew that they, in fact, are the extremists and worried the rest of us might catch on.

They shouldn't be concerned. You and I, we already know. And my colleagues will treat this incident just like they've treated all the others so nobody else will make the connection.

But that's a connection we all need to make. The anger these folks harbor is just below the surface and breaking through. They lack the ability to handle such a strong force sanely. They believe they are justified in whatever they do. They have been poked and prodded repeatedly by their leaders, some of whom do their poking and prodding by turning away and ignoring the most egregious of the pokes and prods.

The "deranged individuals" who carry out these terrorist acts don't just snap one day. They've been pushed to this logical outcome for years.

Expect more of it.


And do your best to counter it. Tell the truth. Tell my colleagues to tell the truth. It's the only way we can break a millennia long habit of resorting to violence when we don't get our way. Those who resort to violence believe they have no other choice. But they do.

It's called acceptance. Hard concept, I know, for those who have no doubts in their righteousness.

For George Tiller and his family, it's too late. But there's still time for others. Make sure it's not too late for them.


AWOP Political Contributing Editor

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